As I said before, writing this is a way to keep my brain at least a little busy as well as to keep some dexterity in my hands and arms. But of course, since this is the nature of blogs, it also keeps the attention on MOI - at least on this page, if not in the wide world. If you're like me and are one of those insecure people who constantly demand some spotlight time, you'll understand what I mean.
Yesterday was very difficult, physically. Woke up with dizziness which progressed to fear and trembling (literally) etc. Got it under control mid-afternoon with the help of Sudafed, of all things. Skipped a day of radiation.
Two docs reassured me that there is very little risk of having another seizure, although the risk is not zero. It's comforting to remind myself of that, to be able to tell myself that it's probably okay, each time something is happening that seems mysterious.
As for writing this blog, it's somewhat uncomfortable. If I were a real writer, I reckon I might have piles of stuff written down like this, but wouldn't show it to anyone in this form. For one thing, it's not terribly interesting, and for another, it's unprocessed. It hasn't been turned into anything else, doesn't have form, isn't pointed and coherent or poetic. And maybe it doesn't even rise to the level of the most crude raw material for some more complete work of thinking/writing.
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What you are writing is meaningful and poetic and beautiful and reflects your experiences in a truth that is difficult to find in this world.
ReplyDeleteCiao Dan, sono dalla Gabri con Matteo, Giulia e Bruno. Stiamo per fare il pranzo pasquale...ci aspetta un banchetto molto ricco come al solito!
ReplyDeleteTi mandiamo tutti un grande bacio a base di torte della Gabri e uova benedette ;-)
Wow, grazie Sara e tutti. Sono qua' con la Lulu alla tavola di cucina. Sono le 6:30 di mattina. Asa e Tom sono sempre a letto , e anche Andrea. Stasera si fara' un barbecue, con i soliti amici. Il tempo questa settimana e' stato bello maggiormente, e allora s'aspetta che anche questo giorno di Pasqua sara' bello. Vi mando delle foto piu' tardi, ok? Per ora, un'abbraccione
ReplyDeleteMy mother used to secretly criticize people in front of us by speaking to me in Mandarin. "She gained a lot of weight." "This kitchen smells like grease." "See how bad someone looks doing their hair that way that you like." All this Italian here reminds me of that.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking as one who also has seizures, I too hate it when the brain pulls the rug out from under me. How disrespectful.
Write, write. You've always been a great letter writer. xoox Amy
Sorry for the Italian that not everyone can read. I know it's rude. The alternative is to post the same message twice, once in each language. Right now, I don't have the energy, but if anyone is dying to know what I've said in either language, please tell me and I'll translate.
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